So I’m catching up on my paper exercise log for the last week, and it hits me: I am absolutely terrible at following through with stuff. Like really following through. My entire life is a string of events where I am able to make initially great progress through luck and natural ability, ending in missed opportunities because I was too eager to relax and sit in the first patch of shade, so to speak, to which I arrived. I could list items ad nauseam, but that’d be dwelling instead of getting off my butt and continuing to soldier on.

What set me off was the three day gap from the easy 3 miles on Wednesday of last week to the 5 miler on Sunday. The gap in and of itself was not so bad, but what killed me was remembering how psyched I was on Wednesday afternoon when I realized that I was only 5.1 miles short of hitting my first hundred miles for the year. I had been pumped, excited about how easy it was going to be to finish out the week with an honest century under my sneakers.

But then I gave blood, and the excuses for slacking added up.

I would have cut myself a bit more slack, but I also stayed out of the pool for the entire week. Grr.

Like I mentioned, this is just another example. The difference is that this time, it appears that I’ve been able ot identify why I continually let myself down. I’ve excelled when there has been someone else to hold my feet to the fire. I need to learn how to hold my own feet to the fire.

Sorry for the downer. In truth, I’m really happy that I’ve finally been able to identify my history of false optimism. I think it’s a good step. Life continues to get better. Why? Because I can make it better.

Good run this afternoon. I’d dropped my wife’s car off for rear wheel bearings (Click and Clack talked about them a couple of weeks back, that they could seize on the highway and pop off the wheel – my mind clicked that the mechanic had mentioned they needed to be fixed the last time the car was in, and they were noticeably noisy) on the way to work, so I worked through lunch, finished up, and headed out for a run.

No iPod, no Forerunner, just sneakers, sweats, and a changed Billy (that’s for Pam).

3 miles or so – right on track for the week. Still felt a bit … tired, but not as noticeable as Sunday’s run.

And I’m over 100 running miles for the year. Can I make 1,000? We’ll see…

9 thoughts on “Insight”

  1. Hey we’ve all had weeks like that. It happens and ya move on, like you are now.

    Are there any races coming up? A goal like that seems to keep me on track. I get my training plan set up and I can stay on track.

    Love Car Talk! :D

  2. Hah! You suck way less than I do. So take a moment to feel superior that you’ve run 100 miles so far this year. Then imagine how much it’d suck if I caught up to you and passed you. And make sure that doesn’t happen. ;)

  3. I don’t know anyone else who had weeks like that. At least you’re back on it.

    Isn’t it great to do a technology free run sometimes? Sort of liberating…

  4. Wow. I could’ve written this post. In fact, perhaps we were separated at birth on this particular point. Because I do very similar things with my motivation. I have GALLONS of it right out of the gate, but hit a little patch of ice, and it’s back to my fallback “dig in and push” approach. I loved the by luck and talent comment. Man, this was one of the most insightful posts I’ve read in a while.

    And you meant it to be about YOU!

  5. Seriously…ditto what Chris said…I was reading this, thinking to myself ‘Did Jank sneak inside my brain and sneak a peek at my most recent thoughts?’ I was just berating myself yesterday for allowing life to continue to pass me by while I sit on my butt and plan and dream but rarely ‘do’ without some type of external motivation. Right there with you. Great post.

  6. I used to run till I came to my senses ;-) Now I only run if someone is chasing me. Three marathons and numerous shorter races, then I stupidly followed the advice in Runner’s World. “Buy a bicycle and cross train” it said. “Sounds good” thought I. Ten years and dozens of bikes later I’m still at it. I used to spend fifty bucks on a pair of running shoes. Now I’m lucky if I can get out of the bike shop for less than three times that. Sigh. Anyway, keep up the good work and ‘this too shall pass.’

  7. I have the same problem, too. Every third week or so I get nailed by scheduling issues that screw up my training. Oh, well… we just get back to it and move on!

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